Mama Rita

             Though we marry “for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer,” it turns out that choosing the right life partner might help you succeed. Barack Obama, for example, attributes his political success to his wife. And science has finally explained that those are not just empty words.              We at  Bright Side  are well aware of the phrase “behind every successful man there is a woman” but we were happy to finally see scientific research that backs this up. It’s all about support!            Perhaps somewhere deep inside, each of us has suspected that our spouse plays a big part in shaping our success. And finally, a study published by Carnegie Mellon University has brought this to a scientific level. It claims that husbands (an...

Long-Distance Friends Are Still Your ‘In Real Life’ Friends, And The Bond Is Strong Samantha Angoletta You know, I’m not exactly sure that “being in the same place” is the same as “being friends.”  –Wilbur ( Charlotte’s Web , 2006 film) Damn it, if this isn’t true. This last weekend was proof. You don’t have to be in the same place, or even live in the same state, to be friends, to find your people, to feel like you’re at home. Our group of Scary Mommy staff writers (minus a few, who were greatly missed, but couldn’t make it) had our first “writer’s retreat” recently. And by “writers’ retreat,” I obviously mean “slumber party,” because there was no work getting done. Just bonding and laughter. So much laughter. You can can tell you’ve found your people when there are no awkward introductions needed because you already know each other so well. When you laugh so hard your sides (literally) still ache the next morning, When you find...

    DEALING WITH TOXIC PEOPLE YOU CAN'T JUST CUT OUT FOREVER   To be honest, coping with toxic people has never been my specialty. I have dealt with enough toxicity in my life to know  when it’s best to cut ties . ( Snip, snip, suckas! ) But we all have toxic people in our lives who can’t be avoided, whether it be a parent or parent-in-law, a sibling or a sibling’s spouse, a friend of a friend, or a co-worker whom you just can’t stand. So how do you deal with people you’d rather avoid at all costs? 1. Set limits. Take it from me, toxic people don’t do well with boundaries. They have a tendency to want to control others as well as situations. Trying to set limits or boundaries  for them  will get you nowhere; they see it as a personal challenge. But you can set limits on the things you  can  control. Don’t invest too much time or effort with toxic people. Keep interactions brief and the topics light. Keep in mind that toxi...

Study Says Pornography Can Hurt Long-Term Relationships Naturally, there have been multiple studies on the subject of pornography covering everything from mental health, to the impact it can have on young children, to its influence on men’s behavior. However, there is little research on the impact of pornography on the stability of long-term relationships. A study published in the  Archives of Sexual Behavior  took a look at that very topic, and naturally they found a mixed bag. Samuel Perry, a sociologist at the University of Oklahoma, authored it. The study worked off of an existing body of work on pornography and relationships and looked at couples where one or both  partners kept porn use a secret . However, it ran into an issue that is common for many sociologists studying the impact of pornography usage: causation vs. correlation. There have been many studies that show a correlation between pornography and negative relationships. But it’s kind of a chic...